My Dad is a Fisherman
And boy does he stink,
of smelly fishes, and salty seas,
I try not to be sick in the kitchen sink.
I try not to choke,
It’s like a poisonous gas,
I try not to reach for my oxygen mask,
He asks for a hug but I just say pass.
After he’s washed you still have to gag,
I excuse myself and hide in my room,
From morning until afternoon,
Ah! there’s dinner, but here comes doom.
It’s smells like,
My dad’s favourite meal,
Snapper Soup and Trout Ice- Cream,
This really can’t be real.
I climb into bed, thank goodness,
A full day done,
Now what’s on tomorrow,
Parent interviews, this really won’t be fun.
We wait for the teacher, at her desk,
I cross my fingers and hope for the best,
She walks in with a smile on her face,
Then her cheeks go green, I could have guessed.
She fled from the room,
Mum looks at Dad and they both look confused,
“Anyone would have thought there was a bad smell”
Ha, Ha, Funny joke but I’m not amused.
So that’s my Dad the fisherman,
You’ll know when you’re near him,
Just wait for a pongy smell,
Then it’s definitely my Dad Tim.
The Farmer and The Pig - by Jenson Young (2nd Place)
There once was a three legged pig,
He was bald so he dressed in a wig.
One day a farmer came,
And asked for the funny pigs name,
Of course he said Oink,
And the farmer accidentally wrote down Doink.
He was entered in a fair,
And won a big pear.
Then the poor pig died,
The farmer got him fried.
He then started makin’,
A big sandwich full of bacon,
He covered it in Ketchup,
Which gave him a big hiccup.
Then the farmers stomach started to swell,
He felt like he was going to hell.
Eventually the swelling stopped,
The farmer then got his fat body popped.
He shot in the air like a burst balloon,
He kept on going until he reached the moon.